One more menstrual cycle left in this decade — can you believe it?! Through those impossible cramps, robust cravings, and roller coaster mood swings, we all need a little laugh. So in honour of bleeding monthly for a decade, here are 23 of our favourite tweets in 2019 about periods:
1. Did I do that? 👀
It’s me, your period pic.twitter.com/9ltoBkzhGe
— sarah schauer 🦂 (@SJSchauer) November 15, 2019
2. Spilling the tea on plant based plastic 🍵
‘Plant-based tampon applicator’ 🌿 It sounds like a good choice, right? The sustainable option? 🤔 Think again! Here’s: https://t.co/wUXLf1KlH5 why they’re not as sustainable as you might think! 😦 #ApplicatorsUnwrapped pic.twitter.com/sZCVmjIwfJ
— natracare (@natracare) October 21, 2019
3. Ready for Broadway
Period: The Musical pic.twitter.com/tE6w68orZ3
— Feelin Good As Hell (@lizzo) October 2, 2019
4. It’s like the period ringtone
You all can keep your menstrual tracking apps: I am “crying to the Beatles while driving” days away from my period.
— Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) November 7, 2019
5. If periods were visible…
🔴If faces were bleeding, someone would do something 🔴THIS SATURDAY is the first-ever #NationalPeriodDay. We’re hosting rallies in all 50 states to demand menstrual equity and an end to the #tampontax. Find your local rally at https://t.co/kj1mxlVLqK. @SeventhGen @BBDOSF pic.twitter.com/qPxrRwlGuQ
— PERIOD (@periodmovement) October 15, 2019
6. RIP my uterus
My child just pulled a pad out of my purse and asked me if this is what I use when my vagina dies sometimes. pic.twitter.com/8NDYQYmWIA
— A Tall Glass Of Hennessy (@beequammie) November 3, 2019
7. Time to take down the patriarchy
Smuggling pads to the bathroom like it’s some sort of illegal drug gotta be the worst adaptation to patriarchy.
— a rapper named dyane. (@skinnydyane) October 30, 2019
8. What are you into?
🔘 using a period tracking app to predict when I’m next due my period so I can exercise appropriately, eat well, and plan outfits accordingly
— natracare (@natracare) March 11, 2019
9. Apple bottom jeans and the tampon with the string
Are we sure Flo Rida isn’t a tampon brand?
— mᎥᏦᎬ ᏞᎥᏆᎬᏒᎪᏞᏞᎽ✪ (@SkippyMcGizzard) February 13, 2019
10. We stan Charli XCX
— 𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇. (@nameiscade) September 25, 2019
11. If boys had periods…
— Thinx (@shethinx) October 3, 2019
12. What do you see?
— sustain natural (@sustain) May 7, 2019
13. Our new favourite code word
So I heard someone call tampons “pussy pops” and now I can’t unhear it
— 🔺iilluminaughtii or nice 🔺 (@iilluminaughtii) November 3, 2019
14. Where’s the lie?
gonna tell my kids this is what a period is pic.twitter.com/gKb7S3zyj7
— natracare (@natracare) November 21, 2019
15. I’m sorry, matriarchy
I normally feel so guilty when any girl asks me for a pad/ tampon and I don’t have one
It’s like I’ve betrayed the matriachy 😭
— Manzi wa Nairobi (@City_girllll) October 31, 2019
16. Spooktober took a bloody turn
Feminine Hygiene Costumes pic.twitter.com/EanQ5nDQde
— Baby Deadpool the Urban Viking (@Eminem11684) October 21, 2019
17. Keeping it real 💯
Everyone wants you to “just be real” until you send nudes with a tampon string and a few drops of blood.
Then it’s all EEEEEW PLEASE PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON AND BE A LITTLE LESS REAL
— Stabbatha Christy (@LoveNLunchmeat) October 17, 2019
18. Genius DIY pocket
got my period (fuck off if thats tmi grow up) and i have no pockets so my spare tampon is under my beanie pls do not take off my hat tonight my tampons are very friendly thank u
— The usual aplomb (@bonatlantic) November 23, 2019
19. Which grammatical punctuation is better?
Who called a woman’s menstrual cycle a period and not a sentence?
— Mr Horse (@ln0217) September 30, 2019
20. Sorry, not sorry…
I took a tampon out of my backpack and put it in my pocket and the guy behind me really had the audacity to say “that wasn’t very discreet”??? I wasn’t trying to be discreet, Chad, I was trying to get a tampon. Mind your business
— Carlie Gail Ⓥ (@CurlyCowgill) November 20, 2019
21. She’s the man
You know when you get a nosebleed and all you have in your bag is an old mint, a tampon and a hair brush? All we’re saying here: https://t.co/0n0dS9iwMt is you can’t rely on a hairbrush to stop the bleeding. A tampon, however… 😉 pic.twitter.com/OBtcFaIXEU
— natracare (@natracare) October 5, 2019
22. Is your vagina connected?
My boyfriend asked how periods can sync between girls and I told him bluetooth vaginas hahaha
— miranda (@miranduhfowler) August 27, 2019
23. It’s like a Disneyland ride
periods are cool because you get to live in a week of constant fear that there’s blood dripping down your leg, it’s quite exhilarating
— celyn ▯ (@celynpetrol) November 22, 2019
Did we miss any A+ tweets about our periods, the monthly visitor? Let us know in the comments below. 👇 Also be sure to check out our list of the funniest tweets about being a mum.